It seeps to the depths of me, thinking
Replaying past events, sighing
Forcing myself to see the future, “Just focus on that!” Sorrowful.

At what point do we receive that peace we know exist? Do we stop trying?
It feels as if I’m always in a cycle,
Do this and propel, take solace in the seemingly comfortable arms of knowing what’s next only to remain here in this spot forever?

There is peace. It exists. I repeat , I repeat, I repeat. The truth is I’m aware there is peace in this moment as well. Because I’ve read somewhere that is it up to us to decide to be at peace. I guess it’ll always be like this. Therefore I’ve decided I’ll be at peace for the rest of this year. I will make it my duty.

I get wary of this fear-filled life. I’m deciding to be at peace when I’m in the midst of chaos – even if it’s of my own doing. I am aware I’m not perfect, I like to think of myself in these moments as if I’m encouraging my child. A mini version of me who’s definitely not perfect but is aware of her mistakes and overwhelmed with the fear of messing up trying to get on the “right path” – whatever that looks like for her.

Just sharing the thoughts I’ve been having for a while now. We know it’s beautiful to bounce back from severe brokenness, despite the constant state of anxiety and hopelessness, I genuinely look forward to my peaceful year ahead. Guys, please chose peace now too.

-Aśe